Ever heard the quote by Steve Harvey in which he states, “You can’t tell your BIG dreams to small minded people”? I don’t think I can agree with him more!
During the past few years I’ve witnessed the effects of sharing my dreams big or small and I’d like to enlighten you on why I’ve learned to just keep them to myself!
1. BIG Dreams vs. Small Minds : Steve couldn’t have worded it better. When you have dreams/plans that you want to achieve, sometimes people’s minds may not be big enough to respect and receive those dreams. You’ll find yourself being the only one who truly believes you can achieve it! Take President Barack Obama for example. I’m sure it was many years prior to him campaigning to be the POTUS that he set the goal for himself. Do you think he shared the goal of becoming the first African American President with the rest of the world? Ummm, probably not! He, like many of us, was surrounded by people who didn’t have the capability of imagining that he could accomplish something so great! I mean, could he really win an election and become the first African American president in a country where he was a minority and there hadn’t been anyone successful enough to achieve that goal before him? Nope! Well, at least that’s what the small minds thought!
2. Nay Sayers – Similar to those who have minds too small to receive your goals, there are also those who exist solely to talk you out of it! These kinds of people tell you things like, “Girl why do you want to do that all of a sudden? Didn’t you just want to do something different last week?” or “Dude, Nahhh I don’t think that’ll be successful! You shouldn’t waste your time with it!” These people are road blocks, surely they can’t think YOU are capable of doing something so great because who are you? You’re a nobody! They will often have negative things to say when you mention your goals or dreams and eventually they’ll give you enough reasons not to go for it!
3. Playa Hatas’ – My favorite! -___- These are just the plain old wanna be’s! So you’ve shared your dreams with people who secretly wish they were you, I hope you didn’t think they were not going to act funny! Ever told your best girl the things you’d like to accomplish and/or the things you’ve already accomplished and she acted funny! Like almost instantly she had a mood shift. Got a little silent! Made an excuse to leave? Changed the subject real quick? HA!!! You may be dealing with a player hater! Lol this kind of friend wants to be YOU or so much like you that they’d rather not see you succeed! The problem is, you can’t always distinguish them in a group of friends until it’s sometimes too late! Playa Hatas come in all shapes, sizes, and colors! It’s important not to leak your dreams or aspirations because you don’t know who is out to get you! You don’t know who will rush to try to accomplish your same dream for you! And you don’t know who will plot to make sure your dream doesn’t come true! Beware of the Playa Hatas!
4. Ill Influencers – Now these aren’t always bad people! Sometimes they’re perfectly good people who unintentionally influence you in a negative way. For instance, you share your dream with someone and they begin to add things to it or build a dream on your dream! You say something like, “I would like to start a daycare center catered to low income families.” Then they add, “Yeah girl and you should have it where the moms can come stay the night if they need to and you can provide free meals for the babies to take home if they don’t have food to eat…!” Woah, what? Lol Not that that was a bad idea at all, but what if your calling was just to help the children, so the parents could have one less thing to stress about? You see where this is going? You can’t let people add to your passion and purpose! Now surely there are instances where you need business partners or a team whose ideas and influence is valued, but you definitely can wait until the dream is more concrete! Don’t be negatively influenced early on before you’re even clear about what your dream is.
5. It’s for you… What God has deemed for you, no man can take or claim. It’s amazing when you’re connected to God and he reveals the plans and purpose for your life! Some people have to sit and meditate in him and build that plan behind the scenes for years. Then when it is finally shared with the world it is a beautiful sight to behold! Spend time with yourself, building and developing your dreams… It’s not for everyone to see or know right away! Your time to share them will come and even they will see the victory of it!
So there you have it, JUST BE QUIET! No one needs to know that you’re opening a business next month, that you’ve been writing that book, that you’ve been wanting to be the next African American President! Less talking and more action people! BIG DREAMS + SILENCE + PRAYER = SUCCESS (& the element of surprise)!
By: Verinique D. Bailey, “The V. in Virtue”